For those who are determined to build a good life with a long term partner, the frustration of finding someone to love can be overwhelming. They see their friends, family and neighbours getting married, but it might seem as if there is no one out there for them. Part of the issue they are having is their focus on falling in love, and they are pushing so hard they are scaring away potential mates. Avoiding this scenario is difficult for those who see their life as empty, so it is important to take steps to correct their behaviour.
Too focused
The issue with being focused on finding the perfect mate to love is that it can make people avoid those who might actually be right for them, but they have such a tight focus they do not see potential. They want someone right at the moment, and anyone who does not fit their list is gone. A person who might not seem perfect at first could be discovered to be just right if they are given a chance, so looking at the future should be done with a wide eye towards all their assets and flaws rather than their appearance on a single date.
Lack of fun
People who are focused tightly on a goal often forget that life should have its brighter moments, and they could be missing out on meeting someone special. The person who might have loved them best will see someone without a sense of humour, and they will never ask for even a first date. Having fun and smiling are the best way to attract multiple dates, so get out and enjoy life.
Be realistic
Love occurs when two people least expect it, but that does not mean life will be a fairy tale. For those who are looking for someone to love, they should understand they will not find someone who matches everything on a list. In the real world, loving someone is about understanding their needs and goals are also important. Those who only look at their own needs will seldom find someone to love.
Move on in life
Many people find someone special during adolescence, but it often does not last past graduation. They might be waiting for that person to return to them, or they could feel it is important to hold out for someone who is just like that former love. Moving on in life is about forming their own successful life, and it will make them more attractive to those who might otherwise ignore them. If they keep moving, they are more likely to find someone to love who fits their adult life instead of what they needed as a teen.
There are no easy answers when it comes to the struggle to find love, but there are ways to make it easier to endure. For those who are still searching, they should look at the life they have and decide if it is what they want. Being a successful single person is often the path that will lead them to find someone who fits perfectly into their life, and a lifelong love could be their reward.
